Freedom From Giving Up Control

I like to be in control.  I really like things to go my way.  I often feel that if people would just do things my way, life would be much better.  The truth is, my way is not always better.  In fact, I usually mess things up when I take control.  Of course, when things go wrong, I blame it on other people, places and things.  

This week I have learned my lesson with taking control.  It just does not work.  When I allow God to control my life, things seem to work out.  It is amazing.  I have a long time friend that I am having issue with.  Honestly, I have allowed her to take advantage of me for years.  She is a hard drinker (drinks tequila all the time) and has brought nothing but chaos into my life.  She has used me and never been a good friend to me.  I do not understand why I have allowed this situation to go on for so long.  In fact, it bewilders me.  

Over the years, I have made excuses for her, watched her child and never held her accountable.  She has crossed every boundary I have had.  Over the last few weeks, God has been revealing to me that He has a plan for her.  It does not include me.  I have sat down, decided what my true boundaries are and stuck to them.  Needless to say, she is not happy with me and I doubt she will be contacting me anytime soon.  

I have also had to look at my responsibility in this situation.  I have had these type of relationships my entire life.  It has to stop.  I just cannot live this way.  My family cannot live this way.  I need to keep healthier relationships and cut ties with the unhealthy ones.  I know this is God's will for me.  My boundaries have to be respected from now on. 

Giving up this control is not easy for me.  I like to think I can "fix" people.  No one truly has this power, though.  I cannot fix her anymore than she can fix me.  Letting go is not easy for me and I will take it one day at a time. I am realizing that I should not do anything for someone that they should be doing for themselves.  I cannot take that responsibility away from them.  Let's see how where this takes me...